Hello from Type A Con!
It’s kind of amazing that I got out of the house at all. I went in to wake Jack up for school yesterday morning and he wasn’t budging. After a few attempts, I decided he must really need the sleep so I left him to it. He woke up right as school was starting and immediately complained of a sore throat, a complete lack of energy, and pain in his elbow (side note: complaints of aches in weird places always set off alarm bells in my head – thanks, cancer!).
I had prepared for this possibility and had my good friend Sabrina on call in case Jack’s three other parents couldn’t get out of work before I had to get on a plane. I then prayed that Jack didn’t spike a fever, which would necessitate a trip to the ER. I also shoved down massive amounts of guilt over leaving my son home sick with someone who isn’t his parent. And frustration over the fact that this seems to happen every time I try to go anywhere!
I left the house, though, and I heard cheers in my head! And drove to the airport, worrying all the while that I’d get a call saying a fever had set in.
That didn’t happen, thankfully, and I made it to Atlanta with only a small flight delay. Upon arrival, I did find out there had been a snafu with getting Jack to his dad’s but it got worked out without me. Phew.
I hope, hope, hope Jack stays fever-free and out of the hospital while I’m away. Frankly, if he gets seriously ill while I’m away, I will freak out. I feel compelled to be there and see him with my own eyes when his health at a low point.
I had to get away, though, and I’m glad I did even if much of my mind is still back home. It’s easy to lose yourself when you’re a caregiver if you’re not careful. It is incredibly important to carve out time for yourself to stave off burnout and that is not something I am good at.
However, I’m getting better at getting out, even if I can’t let go. My life is all about counting the small victories these days, so I will take it!