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Slow and Steady

April 1, 2013 By

We’ve been doing a lot of prioritizing in Casa d’Ewok lately. Mainly we are doing the things we absolutely must do, along with some things that make us happy and that’s about it. We are trying to get rid of extra tasks so that we can focus on getting some of our sanity back.

It’s slow going. There are always things that are unpleasant and time-sensitive to do! And once I get started, I have a hard time stopping because I’m worried about losing momentum. But I’m getting a little better at it all the time.

This weekend we focused on resting when we could and trying to get our house in order. In the last six months, two dimmer switches have broken and one started buzzing, the handle on one of our toilets broke, the refrigerator door stopped closing properly, and our house has really started to look like the Tasmanian Devil lives there. So on Saturday David and I trekked over to OSH and stocked up on various home improvement items. Then I did some laundry and napped while David went about mowing the lawn and fixing the various broken things we’ve been patiently living with for months and months.

I learned that having a husband who can fix things is pretty goddamned awesome. And hot!

We also went over to our neighbor’s house for dinner and board games. It was great to socialize with people who live on our street and then stumble home on foot, tipsy but happy, and hit the hay before midnight! We love our neighborhood and neighbors!

David and I recently discussed the fact that more and more, we are becoming homebodies. 90% of our weekdays are now spent working, commuting, and caring for a child with chronic illness, so…the weekends mean a lot. We need that time together at home. This used to cause me a great deal of angst – I’m a terrible homemaker, yet I don’t like sitting at home on my ass, either. I’ve always needed to get out and do things and see people!

But now it’s different. I feel old and tired and in need of some very straightforward, repetitive, easy things. I don’t want to go anywhere or have obligations or spend money. I want to spend time with my husband and my son and I want to spend time with myself. I want to relax and live at my own pace.

So, I am doing that. And it feels good.

Filed Under: Domesticating, Getting my groove back Tagged With: , , , , , , 1 Comment

Save Your Money, Save The World

November 14, 2012 By

Last week I attended a luncheon hosted by my local electric/gas company PG&E and Opower, thanks to Mom Central. The purpose of the event was to share information on how to conserve energy and save money. As a new and, frankly, flat broke home owner, I was very interested in the topic. I need all the money savings I can get and I live in California – home of the rolling blackouts – so if I can avoid those, all the better!

So, here’s the deal with PG&E and Opower. PG&E is the utility company for the majority of California and they have enlisted the help of Opower, a software company, to employ an energy management system that will help engage and encourage customers to conserve energy. PG&E’s revenue is no longer based on how much electricity people use; instead there are regulations in place that state they must develop energy savings programs in order to receive profits. This is a huge win for the environment as it makes everyone more aware of conserving precious resources and a win for consumers because it will save money and keep the power on longer.

A fact that really struck me was that since 2008 Opower has saved enough electricity to take a city the size of Oakland off the grid for an entire year. They’ve done this by harnessing the power of our peers because research has shown that the best way to get people to cut back on their energy use is to educate them about what their neighbors are doing. It’s easy not to think about how much you use on a daily basis and live in La La Land thinking you’re doing plenty for the environment, but if you get a report that shows that you are an energy hog compared to your neighbors? Well, damn, that makes an impact! No one wants to be the asshole neighbor – particularly when they find out they’re being put in a higher rate tier and paying more money because of it.

For my fellow PG&E customers, there are some awesome things in store on the PG&E website. The first is already available – if you log into your account online you can run various reports on your energy consumption and get tailored tips on what your household can do to lower your consumption and save money. It’s super easy to find out about rebates and other incentives you qualify for with this interface, as well. Anybody need some evidence to show their spouse that the old piece of crap refrigerator that clicks all day long needs to be replaced? This is your chance – you can probably even qualify for cash back.

My favorite graph is the one that shows you how much electricity you are using at different times of day – I figure you can catch someone stealing your internets at noon on a Tuesday if you pay attention – “Hm, what’s that curious spike in the middle of the day when no one is home?” You might also be able to detect a malfunctioning appliance before it shuts down completely on you.

Many customers are now receiving printed reports along with their paper bills that show what their consumption is right alongside their neighbors’. A lot of the houses on our block are the same size and have a lot of the same features inside – so if I find out I’m using more electricity than most of my neighbors, I can then go and figure out what they are doing that I’m not! Maybe it really is time to replace those windows.

Even more fun is the social apps Opower has developed. For instance, they’ve partnered with Facebook in order to implement an app that allows you to see how you stack up with your friends as far as energy consumption goes. Nothing like a little bit of friendly competition to inspire environmental conscience, right?

I’ve jumped right into using the online tools. Our energy usage is pretty good so far and our bills are manageable, but I’m hoping we can fine tune what we do around the house and make the most of every dollar. (I know my husband is hoping this gets me to turn off more lights around the house. But I NEED LIGHT!) PG&E has shown that those customers who simply log in to the site to review their account and energy usage save 23% more on gas than other customers. One of the tools to assist with this is their energy alert system, which triggers an email, phone call, or text message when you are about to go into the next (more expensive) rate tier. If there are only a few days left in the billing cycle, maybe you can bundle up a bit more and take shorter showers until your next cycle begins and save a bit of cash! I know I would use that cash for a latte…

Opower is partnering with utility companies all over the country (and the world!), so keep an eye out. Here is a list of where they are now so that you can take advantage of these awesome tools:

  • AEP Ohio (OH)
  • Arizona Public Service (AZ)
  • Burbank Water and Power (CA)
  • Commonwealth Edison (IL)
  • Connexus Energy (MN)
  • Constellation / Baltimore Gas & Electric (MD)
  • Southern Company / Gulf Power (FL)
  • National Grid (MA, NY)
  • Pacific Gas & Electric (CA)
  • PPL Electric Utilities (PA)
  • San Diego Gas & Electric (CA)
  • Xcel Energy (MN, CO)

Have you heard of these tools before? Are you using them? If not, I hope you all will all join me in using these tools so that we can start saving money AND the environment.

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I wrote this review while participating in a campaign by Mom Central Consulting on behalf of PG&E and Opower. I attended an informational luncheon and received a promotional item to thank me for my participation.

Filed Under: Domesticating, Family, Reviews 2 Comments

An Unexpected Weekend Of Freedom

October 15, 2012 By

We had an unexpectedly free weekend without Jack. It involved a lot of lazing around since I got two migraines (ugh!), but it was still pretty relaxing to get a break from medication struggles for a couple of days. Usually our weekends without Jack are filled with social stuff. We did a bit of that, but since it was last minute most people had plans already. David and I took the opportunity to spend some quality time together, watch a movie, and even go out for breakfast on Saturday. It was divine!

On Sunday I spent a glorious two hours at Target all by myself! There are a lot of little things we needed and I like to save ‘em up because everyone knows you can’t get out of Target without spending at least $100. I browsed to my heart’s content since I had nowhere to be. I bought the laundry sorting hamper I’d been wanting – it has three compartments and each one can be removed and carried (downstairs) to our washing machine. My floor looks so much nicer now (that I can see it)! Time saver, too!

I was also able to grab some Halloween decorations from the dollar bin and some items to make packing Jack’s lunches easier – an insulated lunch bag, some small Gladware containers, and an ice pack. The lunch bag had a place for me to write Jack’s name, which I really appreciate. That kid loses everything!! Today I got an email from Mabel’s Labels and realized I need to order some of those for school, too (IF ONLY they sold them at Target!). And since Jack likes all things creepy, Halloween sales are perfect! Check it out:

Happy Halloween! Don’t let this fabulous offer from Mabel’s Labels scare you!

From now until 10/19, or while supplies last, Mabel’s Labels is offering a $3 off coupon for Allergy Alert labels, with all Halloween Loot Bag Combo purchases. The Loot Bag Combo was inspired by celebrities who love to include the Mabel’s Labels waterproof Sticky Labels and Bag Tags in their children’s birthday party loot bags. These sweet combos make great party favors and add a personalized touch to gifts! Best of all, you save $3 off Allergy Alert labels. Perfect for keeping your child safe this Halloween. Don’t miss your chance to shop this great offer!

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It may be happening slowly, but we are indeed getting back to a routine and finding our way again. Now if only there was a product I could buy that made getting homework done easier…I’d pay a fortune for that!

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This post contains sponsored content. For more information, please see my full disclosure statement.

Filed Under: Domesticating, Gear, Getting my groove back, School 1 Comment

Moving Right Along

May 31, 2012 By

I have a lot going on.

We’re moving in 2.5 weeks. We still have a ton of packing to do! We’re really excited, though. I think we’re all still holding our breath a tiny bit until we ACTUALLY move in. Still, David and I have been on the hunt for new furniture, so I suppose we’re fairly confident all will be well.

Jack’s in his most intense phase of treatment (although, thus far, has been doing super well and it hasn’t been very intense!). A few days before we move, we start chemo infusions AT HOME. I’ve opted to take a leave of absence from work during this time. The first few days of this phase had me checking on Jack at night and worrying about him dying while asleep. I had nightmares that *I* was getting chemo and feeling horrid and could only imagine how he felt. Thankfully Jack hasn’t appeared to be sick and planning my LOA from work has helped calm me. We can do this!

We’ve managed to get up to wine country twice in the last month. It’s been wonderful. This is the best little escape for us – it’s not far and we can get out of there without spending a ton of money. One of the trips was free, in fact, because of my job (I occasionally get wooed by venues that are hoping I’ll book events with them). These brief trips have been a welcome relief and refreshed us a bit. On Memorial Day David and I met his sister L and her husband. We haven’t seen them since we got married! It was wonderful to catch up and hang out without a real schedule.

As if all the activity above wasn’t enough, I’m heading to the Type A Conference in North Carolina at the end of June. I’m flying to Atlanta to hook up with my friend Jana and then we’re driving to Charlotte. I’m nervous about being away from Jack during that time, but think this will be good for me to get away and let his dad take care of him while I get a break. Still, I bought travel insurance in case I need to change my plans at the last minute due to a health issue!

That’s all I’ve got for now. How are you? Any questions? I know I’ve been MIA…what am I forgetting? (Probably most things!)

 

Filed Under: Cancer Mom, Domesticating, Family 1 Comment

Some Joy

May 18, 2012 By

Considering the last time I mentioned a house, we were going to wait to look for House #5, this may be surprising to hear, but we’re in escrow on House #6. Mmhmm.

Number 5 came and went and then came 6. This lovely place is down the street from what we’re calling Mold House. It’s also a million times more awesome and the BEST house we’ve seen (in about 60 total). We were more than a little surprised when our offer was accepted. We weren’t surprised at all when the inspection was fabulous. THEN…then the appraisal came back at a bizarrely low amount and the whole thing nearly fell apart with our financing. We challenged the appraisal and after waiting on pins and needles for three and a half days, we finally heard back – the appraisal was revised. The house was once again in our reach if the sellers could meet us half way on bridging the gap in financing. And they DID! Yay!

We’re not out of the woods yet. We need the bank to approve our new financing. But we’re damned close! We should know for sure that everything is a go next week. We assume nothing until then!

Amidst this house drama, Jack lost his first tooth – one on the bottom. For some reason this makes us absurdly happy. I guess because it’s a sign he’s growing up even while fighting cancer. He’s living! And he’s damned cute with a missing tooth. He has a slight lisp and has trouble with S sounds at the moment. It’s adorable.

I also had a wonderful Mother’s Day! David and Jack made me breakfast in bed and then we went out to have fondue for lunch. I loved the pampering. We had our celebration a bit early so that Jack could have fun with his dad the next weekend while David and I took off for Sonoma. I got an incentive trip through a contact at work – two nights in a resort hotel plus wine tasting, dinner, and brunch – all free. We sprung for massages, too. I felt like I got two Mother’s Days!

Life isn’t all bad right now. I’m glad I get some relief, even if it’s hard won!

Filed Under: Cancer Mom, Domesticating, Family Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , 2 Comments

Waiting For No. 5

April 17, 2012 By

The cancellation for our contract on the house was processed yesterday. We were willing to move forward if the sellers would work with us on a credit toward repairs, but they were adamantly opposed to budging one bit. We’re super disappointed. We spent money on the house already, we were supposed to move into it in a few weeks, we were emotionally invested…and after looking at 53 houses and making 4 offers, we were ready to be done looking. We are tired.

So now we sit back a bit and regroup. The housing market around here has dwindled and there isn’t much to look at currently. The bright side is we’ll have more time to save up more for a down payment, I guess…

Filed Under: Domesticating, Family Tagged With: , , , , , , 1 Comment

Our New Fuzzy Friends

April 11, 2012 By

It’s not been a good week thus far. I went to three different hospitals four different times in less than 24 hours on Sunday/Monday. We drew Jack’s labs twice. And I lost count of the meltdowns Jack had.

We found out yesterday that the house we’re buying has a mold problem. We knew from the initial inspection there were drainage issues but expected those to be fairly easily addressed with a credit for closing costs. Our inspector recommended we get mold testing, though, just to be cautious, so we got a microbiologist out last Friday. Although there weren’t major problems visible to the naked eye, the air samples she took in two of the bedrooms (master & Jack’s proposed room) came back yesterday and showed that mold spores from the wet crawl space are getting into the house through the HVAC. The levels were pretty high and the heater hadn’t even been on!

The house is not habitable currently. The carpets will need to be torn out, the furnace replaced, all of the ducting replaced, and the whole place washed down and retested…oh and the drainage problem that started all this needs to be addressed, as well. If we go super cheap on everything that’s probably $9k.

In a normal sale this could be negotiated to be taken care of by the sellers; however, this is a short sale. That means nothing can be done to the house to correct these issues until escrow closes (April 27) and it will have to be done by us. We can get a credit toward closing costs but closing costs may be less than the cost of the repairs. If that’s the case, we will probably have to walk away from the house having flushed $1k in inspection costs down the drain…

If it all somehow works out with the credit covering the costs of repairs and we close on the expected April 27 date, it will likely be at least a week or two before we can get everything fixed, retested, and then move in. Waiting a couple of weeks isn’t too terrible – especially compared to losing the house altogether. We would just have to hope nothing ELSE shows up when we start pulling the place apart.

Our luck, thus far this year, has not been very good so I wouldn’t bet on things coming up rosy.

Filed Under: Domesticating Tagged With: , , , , , , 4 Comments

Where I’m Complainy

March 29, 2012 By

Jack is being a total pill lately. I’m not sure if he has been saving it all up for when things with his cancer treatment weren’t so intense or what but it sucks! Sometimes it’s a matter of snapping at us or demanding that we not say certain things (tonight it was “googly eyes”). Other times he won’t pick up after himself and defaults to “my legs hurt.” It makes it difficult to tell when he is really not feeling well and when he is just trying to get out of something!

This is weird territory for us. I know many of the medical professionals we’ve seen have mentioned to me that discipline should still be in Jack’s life but, oy. Who has energy for discipline on top of all the cancer stuff? And how do I even tell if he’s just being a little jerk or really not feeling well? One minute he’ll dash into his room and the next he is crawling on his knees to the bathroom.

Lord knows I’m not at my best, either. Fatigue has more than caught up with me, it seems. I’ve taken more than my fair share of naps lately. Hopefully I will ‘catch up’ soon.

I have one more complaint before closing out this sorry post. :P It’s become much harder to share the CaringBridge site with Jack’s dad. Aside from it seeming that he has more and more been using the site as his personal blog instead of Jack’s, having that much insight into what goes on when Jack’s at his house is driving me bonkers. I worry constantly that Jack does too much over there and Jack’s recent attitude problems haven’t helped relieve that fear…especially since Jack has been spending more time there since he’s not in school and David is back at work. I have to keep reminding myself that I can’t entirely protect Jack from his dad’s shenanigans – I can only teach him how to speak up for himself – and becoming a stay-at-home mom is not the answer (although it sounds more appealing on the days when Jack isn’t being a jerk to me…).

Alright, there is my bitch session. Time to put the kiddo to bed!

Filed Under: Cancer Mom, Domesticating, Parenting 101 Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , 5 Comments

Doing What I’m Doing

March 28, 2012 By

There is so much going on. In fact, my therapist suggested I’m doing too much. To which I heartily answered YES! I would love to do less! Unfortunately I don’t have that option. Welcome to my life, sir.

David started his new job this past Monday. So far it’s going great (I think). We’re trying to get some sort of routine going and rearrange schedules with Jack going to his dad’s and our dog going to doggie daycare in the mornings and then hanging with me at work in the afternoons. That’s been interesting! I’m having a bit of a hard time adjusting to seeing Jack less and seeing the dog more. :P

Things have certainly heated up in the house hunt! Saturday morning a house popped out of escrow and back on the market. Since it was in the school district we wanted and the neighborhood we had already had our hearts set on, we were all over it (even if we had put an offer on another house a few days earlier). David went to the open house on Sunday and when he got home and told me about it (I had been out with my friend Beth getting a much-needed pedicure), I decided I had to see it ASAP. I couldn’t reach our real estate agent (she was in a meeting) so I called up the agent listed on the flyer David had brought home and made arrangements to see the house that evening.

When we drove up to the house, my eyes widened as I recognized a guy I work with playing with is kids in the front yard of the house next door. Of all the houses we’ve looked at (52 or so) in all of the Bay Area cities (7!), we pull up to look at a house next door to a dude I sit 10 feet from at work? Furthermore, he has two boys, aged 6 and 8 who wanted to show me their airplane right off the bat. I am so looking forward to Jack playing with these kids.

The house itself is great. It’s not flashy but it’s comfortable and more than meets our needs. There are things in it that we all can enjoy! I’m super excited about the indoor laundry room and the fact that it has air conditioning. I haven’t had air conditioning in over 10 years! David loves the view and the double oven. Jack will likely be a fan of all the kids his age on the street and the fact that he gets to ride his bike in the partially paved backyard.

We put in our offer immediately and by the next evening we found out we had a house. WOOHOO!

The inspection takes place this Saturday and we move in a month. I’ll get through this by remembering all the hell we’re avoiding by getting out of our current residence! And the much shorter trips to the hospital with Jack. And the extra room so that we can actually have family and friends visit. And and and…

Jack health has been good and for that we are thankful. He did start into his next mini-phase and that is affecting his mood quite a bit. He’s had some serious meltdowns lately. Mood swings aren’t a noted side effect of the two chemo drugs he is getting, so I’m thinking it has to be a combination of fatigue and body aches making him grumpy. Between weakness and achy bones, he’s crawled to different rooms of the house on more than one occasion. Our Case Manager said we may want to think about physical therapy. It should be interesting trying to fit that in!

I know I’m doing too much (I have the fatigue to prove it) but can’t seem to find a quiet moment these days. I need a pause button on my life…

Filed Under: Cancer Mom, Domesticating, Growing Up 3 Comments

Coming Down the Mountain

March 19, 2012 By

So, it seems I got a mild concussion while (attempting) skiing. Also I hurt my trapezius muscle so my doctor gave me  a prescription strength anti-inflammatory pain killer to help with the neck/shoulder pain. I think next time I go to Tahoe I’ll just head straight to a massage therapist rather than up or down any mountains.

The house hunt continues. We put an offer in on an awesome house in our ideal neighborhood and were outbid. I’m feeling a bit heartbroken over that. It helped me get over it (slightly) when the listing agent came back and asked us for a higher bid “in the 420k range” and when we asked for clarification, she came back with $440k. Um, lady, that is NOT the 420k range. Further, you’re insane mkay byyyye! So we are still looking and feeling pretty dejected at this point. I think we’re up to 43 houses viewed now. The market has stalled so it feels like we’ll be stuck in our shitty rental forever. Not fun! A few people have said inventory will pick up in spring; I surely hope so.

Between those things above and my incredibly stupid idea to try to gradually reduce my anti-depressant intake…I haven’t been doing well. Luckily I realized it fairly quickly and did an about-face with the med plan. It will take a little bit of time for my levels to return to normal…in the mean time I am trying not to get too down about all the stress and craziness (including our broken washing machine, our broken heater, and the lack of a suitable house to escape to).

With that said, things are looking up. David accepted a job and will be starting next week. YAY! We’re very excited! We so needed that change of luck!

Filed Under: Domesticating, Marriage 2 Comments
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