Getting Jack Back

“Mom, I’m starting to get used to myself in the mirror,” Jack told me recently. He further explained that he was feeling better about how he looks with short hair. I told him that’s great! He is a handsome kid no matter what his hair looks like and I’m very happy he can see it.

His appearance is worlds better than it was nine months ago. He’s put a few pounds on since he was first diagnosed (he’s gone from 42lbs to about 45) and his hair is growing back fairly quickly with mostly the same consistency and color as before he lost it. His eyes aren’t as sunken and the circles are there less frequently.

He runs, he climbs, he is mostly back to his old self. He has fewer aches and pains, more energy, and expresses less fear. This was readily apparent on our recent trip to the zoo with some neighbor boys – Jack challenged them to races and climbed a tree with them, too! We were there for four hours and he didn’t even say once that he was tired. *I* was the one who had to nap when we got home.

The Child Life Specialist mentioned that the fact that he is feeling so good is likely part of the reason Jack’s been having difficulty taking his medicines since maintenance began. He LOOKS healthy, he FEELS healthy, so it’s hard for him to feel motivated to take something that tastes terrible and doesn’t make him feel any better. Not to mention the fact that he’s just plain sick of being a cancer crusader – he’s gone back to school and just wants to be a regular kid.

We have a lot of cancer treatments to get through still – two years more – but I’m happy to see that we don’t have to wait that long to have our boy back. We missed him.

Make A Wish, Little Monster

Last week I submitted the referral for Jack’s wish to the Make A Wish program. If you are living in a hole (one with internet access?) and are unaware of this program, it’s a charitable organization that grants wishes to seriously ill children. From what I understand, most of these kids want to go to Disneyland. Jack, being Jack and ever-unique, wants something very different.

At first, Jack said he wanted to act in a movie as Charlie (of Willy Wonka fame). I thought that was pretty interesting. His dad suggested meeting a football player, which Jack had absolutely no interest in. It was a few weeks later when he settled on wanting to meet Lady Gaga and become one of her “Little Monsters.”

I’m not sure what exactly first drew Jack to Lady Gaga. There were a few songs on the radio and he immediately loved them and protested if I tried to change the station. Then he began requesting that I play Lady Gaga songs every time we got in the car. That led to asking to see her pictures (he declares that people are beautiful based upon their voices on the radio) and then a whole new level of fascination developed. Once he learned that she dresses up in crazy outfits (he thought the meat dress was hilarious), his artistic little heart was completely smitten. After all, Jack has dressed up as one thing or another – or just pretended to be some magical monster or alien – just about every day of his life. In fact his daycare provider quickly learned not to call him “Jack” upon drop off, and instead asked who or what he was that day.

So, one evening he and I were sitting at home hanging out. Jack was dressed as a bat and we were discussing his wish in between his eating everything in sight (he was on the steroid at the time). I figured I’d show him one of Lady Gaga’s music videos. Well, once he saw one, he wanted to watch them all! I sifted through the videos and picked the most kid-friendly ones (this does NOT include Paparazzi!). After watching a half dozen of her videos, Jack decided he needed to make a video, as well, to go along with his wish!

Now, Jack is not very athletic. He was never the kid that swayed his diapered booty to music and he does not sing – nor does he allow most people to sing in his presence. Partially because he is noise-sensitive and partially because he gets incredibly embarrassed by grandiose displays. Up until this evening, I’d only heard him humming (but I wasn’t allowed to acknowledge it) and the only dancing he’d done was in my arms as a baby. Not to mention, he had already begun chemo and was generally low energy, sore, and pretty blah.

I’m sure you can imagine my surprise when I turned on some Lady Gaga music and found myself recording this low-quality video (the darkness is one of many reasons we left our apartment in the city) of a dance routine Jack came up with on the spot to go with his Make a Wish application:

We should hear back this week from the Make a Wish Foundation about when they’ll be out to interview Jack regarding his “one true wish.” I can’t wait!

The Face of Triumph

Thanks to Plum Organics for sponsoring my post about fun kid photos and the stories behind them. Enter Plum’s “Babies for Yum Caption Contest” on Facebook and you could win a $100 gift card or Plum goodies.

For Jack’s fifth birthday, I wanted to do something different.  I didn’t want to add even more toys to his already bulging pile (I am pretty sick of stepping on Legos) and he’s been very adamant lately that he wants to spend time with me (usually instead of going to daycare), so I thought a shared experience would be a great alternative.

David and I discussed a trip to Disneyland but, after looking at the insanely high cost a trip like that would be and taking into account that Jack has fun playing with things like cardboard boxes, we thought something close to home would be just as good.  It didn’t take long to decide on Discovery Kingdom in Vallejo – they have a TON of rides that are tailored to younger children and, since I wasn’t sure how Jack would react to the rides, there are many animal exhibits as an added benefit.  I figured we couldn’t go wrong.

I was right!  Jack absolutely loved the theme park (EXCEPT for the roller coaster, which he “kinda hated”).  One of the coolest things about the theme park was the selection of carnival games.  I know what you’re thinking – carnival games are typically quite scammy; however, there was a balloon game with a little sign that said something like “children play until they win.”  I was beside myself with the AWESOME (especially after recently experiencing a fundraiser carnival where Jack tried several times to win and had no luck, which led to a meltdown).  I forked over $5 for a couple of darts and on his 4th try Jack managed to pop TWO balloons with one dart, shocking all of us!  Rather than go for one big prize, he decided on two smaller stuffed dolphins, one of which he gave to his 2 year old cousin Sabrina.  He named the blue one that he kept Splash.

Here is a picture of him posing triumphantly with his winnings (doesn’t he look so blasé?):

 

And the gold medal goes to Jack!

Jack was super happy to have won and Sabrina was delighted with her dolphin.  Neither child let their new toys out of their site for the rest of the day.

Let me tell you – that was the BEST $5 I have ever spent!

I was selected for this sponsorship by the Clever Girls Collective, which endorses Blog With Integrity, as I do.

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Luck, Leprechauns, and Little White Lies

Leprechaun with rainbow

Image via Wikipedia

Jack didn’t want to leave the house to go to daycare today.  He was whining and moaning about how much he HATES getting dressed and how it’s “stubborn” that he has to go to daycare.  I then came up with the brilliant plan of telling him it’s a SPECIAL! DAY!  He perked up and asked what I was talking about.  I explained that it’s St. Patrick’s Day and some people believe that it’s a good day to catch leprechauns.  He had no idea what the heck a leprechaun is, of course.  I explained that they are little people from Ireland who hide a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.  I showed him pictures on the internet, which he loved.  He asked me if leprechauns were for real life and I said I didn’t know and there are definitely some people who do not believe they are real.

I figured he would like this whole idea but I underestimated his enthusiasm.  He wanted to hear all about it so I let him know he should wear green today so he could be extra lucky and maybe catch a “tricky leprechaun.”  They hide and you have to be on the look out, you know!  In fact, I’ve never even see one because they are so sneaky!  Well, he filled in the rest.  These little suckers apparently wear green as camouflage so that it’s difficult to see them when they hide in bushes and trees.  And “no one knows if they are going to be on top of the tree or behind the tree!”

Jack picked out a green monster shirt to wear.  His theory: “Maybe I can scare the leprechaun with this monster shirt and he will run away and leave his gold for me to take!”  Very clever, I thought.  He also came up with the idea of putting traps at the end of the rainbow.  “Well, mom, you just don’t know which end of the rainbow he’ll be at!”

It was so hard not to crack up while he was telling me all kinds of new things about leprechauns even though he hadn’t heard of them before today.  We saw a neighbor’s nanny as we were walking to the car and Jack told her all about the special day and how he was going to catch one of those leprechauns!  He made sure his friends at daycare were wearing green.  I suggested he work together with his little friends and maybe they could find a leprechaun.

I then told him good luck and left for work.

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I’d like to call this red Lego Friday

I woke up at 8am this morning and Jack informed me he had a Lego lodged in his nose.  I was not able to determine WHY he had stuck a Lego up his nose until later, but I could see that it was a small, one-unit round Lego.  I grabbed a pair of tweezers to try to get it out but could not get a handle on the friggin’ thing.  Oh, and Jack doesn’t know how to blow his nose.  I know, weird.  I woke David up to see if he had any ideas.  He also tried with the tweezers but then sent me to the store for a nasal aspirator.  I stopped for some coffee, as well.  Hey, I needed something warm to hang onto!

Back home and the nasal aspirator didn’t do a damned thing.  Then we tried to get Jack to sneeze with pepper and feathers.  No go!  I started to get more desperate.  I tucked his right nostril closed, had Jack close his mouth, and tried to suck that puppy out of the left nostril with my mouth.  Yeah, ewwwww.  Also, salty!  I tried a couple times and it just wasn’t working.  ARG!

So at 9:30am we trotted down to Kaiser’s emergency room.  An ER nurse advised me to try reverse-CPR by pinching the unaffected nostril closed while blowing in Jack’s mouth.  Jack thought this was hilarious.  I tried several times and again, no luck!

In comes the doctor.  She had me try once again with the reverse CPR and saw that the Lego didn’t move.  She then got a few tools (longer tweezer type things with no sharp edges and an alligator clamp) and the nurses held Jack down, instructing him to only say “stop” if he felt pain.  Jack pretended he was a dragon and told them “the dragon is scared.”  Telling them about the dragon distracted him enough and the doctor was able to use the tweezers to get the Lego out.  Jack was as good as new!

We got a nice souvenir out of that $100 trip – the doc put the Lego in a specimen cup and gave Jack an Iron Man sticker.  It was then that Jack told me the little red Lego was dragon fire…he had wanted to breathe fire out of his nose.  Now that he has the Lego in the specimen cup, it is venom.  Awesome.

Happy black Friday!  And remember – the ER does not participate in post-Thanksgiving sales.

Trip to the SF Zoo

Sunday Jack and I went to the San Francisco Zoo.  A trip to the zoo was on my list of 110 Goals for 2010 and when I happened to look on the website Saturday I found out kids were free in August.  Off we went for some more mom/son time.  We rented a little push Jeep thingy because Jack “doesn’t like to walk.”  He did like to stand in it, though, and stick his legs out.  Kid likes to give me heart attacks!  At least I got exercise pushing my 40 lb kid around for a couple hours.

The zoo was bigger than I expected and we didn’t get to see everything in our 2.5 hours there but we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves.  We took pictures together in a photo booth and Jack posed by this begging giraffe.  Probably only in San Francisco can a kid wear sweat pants and a long sleeved shirt in summer.

Strangely, Jack would not let the photographer at the entrance of the zoo take his picture so there are no pictures of the two of us.  He hid his face between his knees.  I could tell the photographer was getting a little upset that he couldn’t get Jack to cooperate so we had to make a break for it with my muttered apology.  Poor photographer probably wasn’t ready to be tested by Jack’s stubborn willpower.  :P

It was really nice to get two adventures in with Jack over the weekend.  I was a little alarmed when at one point Jack said to me, “Mom, you shouldn’t be a mom.”  I had to gather myself a bit before asking for more information about that statement, and I was relieved when he said, “You are fun and I like you and you should be a dad.”  Hm, okay then.  At least he likes me!

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Family Alien Day

David was out of town for his bachelor party this weekend, so Jack and I hung out together solo.  It struck me on Friday that this weekend was a fabulous opportunity for the two of us to have quality mom/son time before I go out of the country for 9 days.  I ignored all my other responsibilities and focused on Jack – it was fabulous!

I happily found out that Habitot in Berkeley was having a Family Alien Day (even better – we got half off the tickets because we are members of the Bay Area Discovery Museum).  I saved the news until Saturday morning because I knew Jack would freak out with excitement.  He nearly had a breakdown when he realized he didn’t have any green alien gear and tried to insist that we go to the store to get him a proper outfit. Instead I convinced him that his Superman (pajama) costume was perfect.  After all, Superman is like THE most famous alien ever!

Prior to Saturday we had never been to Habitot.  I had no idea what Jack was missing out on.  As soon as we walked in there was a big mock space shuttle complete with keyboards, buttons, joysticks for steering…Jack spent the majority of his time in that thing.  He had so much fun pretending to dodge asteroids and steer the ship out of craters.  (I spent much of the time imagining how I could get David to build a space shuttle bed for Jack.  Wouldn’t that be SO COOL?)  There was a control station with buttons that made shooting noises outside of the shuttle and Jack thought it was great.  I was amused watching the kids negotiate with one another and I could barely contain my laughter when a child dressed as Batman tried to start the good old Batman vs. Superman debate.  Jack just walked away from the kid.

We did some face painting, enjoyed crater cookies and space punch, and experimented with space goo.  Jack wore himself out running around.  We headed home and both took 3 hour naps.  It was a perfect day.

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Jack is back (and toys, toys, toys)

I had a pretty fabulous weekend with Jack.  I am *so* glad he is back from Texas.  The nightmares were really getting to me and I just don’t know what to do with myself when I don’t have someone to take care of!  I get bored.

Friday we went to our first company picnic with David’s employer.  The picnic was held at Coyote Point and it was certainly a beautiful day for it.  Jack was all over the jungle gym and completely wore himself out.  He and I left early (for naptime) while David stayed to participate in volleyball and other team sports.

Saturday Jack and I got out the door early and went to Ross to spend my store credit.  I found a good deal on an 8-pack of games (Go Fish, Bingo, Dominoes, etc. – it’s an inexpensive past time, after all) that are decked out with the Toy Story 3 characters.  Jack got totally excited when he spotted an Iron Man toy (how he knew what it was, I don’t know!) so I just had to get it for him (I get indulgent around birthdays…).  We also nabbed a Transformers blanket.

When we got home I was put to work assembling Iron Man; I nearly broke my fingers trying to assemble it!  No wonder it was so cheap…  Jack loves it, though, and it is now included in the group of toys he takes to bed.  We also played our first game of Go Fish.  Jack didn’t quite get it so…I won.  :P

Speaking of bed, he cleared the blankets off his bed to put the new Transformers blanket down for naptime.  The kid is serious about this blanket, folks.  I’ve had to go into his room numerous times to straighten it out after he tosses and turns and it gets “bunched.”  He simply *must* have the blanket flat and smooth so he can see all the details (even in the dark).  The upside is that if I tell him he has to lay really still so as not to mess it up, he falls asleep pretty quickly.  ;)

Sunday was our big adventure to the movie theater to see Toy Story 3 in 3D.  I had never seen a movie in 3D before and I was absolutely dazzled.  We all loved the movie (and there were definitely some tears near the end).  It was the perfect ending to the series and will definitely become part of our collection once it’s on DVD.  The theater sound system was a little loud for Jack and he got scared, but he was totally fine once he crawled into my lap.  It was nice to snuggle with him while watching the movie and afterward he would not acknowledge that the movie was scary at all.  He has not stopped talking about it since.

When I arrived to pick Jack up at daycare today, he was singing the ABCs to a newborn baby.  He proceeded to tell me he wants a little brother AND a little sister.  I told him to give me more weekends like this one and we’ll see what happens!

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Missing my baby

Jack has been in Texas with his dad since last week.  I miss him a TON.  They get back to town on Thursday, and Friday we’ll be spending the day with David at his company’s picnic.  I’m so glad we get to hang out with each other that day so I can hug him a million times and smoosh his face.  Some time over the weekend we are going to see Toy Story 3 – we’ve been talking about it for months and I am SO EXCITED to take Jack to the movies.

I’ve been keeping myself busy so as not to focus on the fact that my kiddo is halfway across the country and it’s been a week and a half since I’ve seen him…we scrubbed the house from top to bottom this past weekend.  When Jack is around it’s hard to get motivated because within an hour there will be another toy-strewn path of destruction in the living room.  I’m sure it will all go to hell again once the little monster gets home.

I’m getting the arrangements set for Jack’s birthday party.  Can you believe he is turning FOUR?  I’m seriously missing my baby!  (It’s possible that sometime in my life I might want to repeat the whole baby experience – although I haven’t gotten over the part where I smack myself every time that thought enters my head.  My face is getting sore, though…)

FOUR YEARS OLD.  Oh my goodness.

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A Piece of Quiet

We are in Tahoe this weekend.  We so need this weekend away from the city and our responsibilities.  It’s beautiful up here blanketed in snow, icicles hanging from the eaves.  It’s crisp but sunny outside and the panoramic views in the cabin make for a wonderfully relaxing environment.

Despite going to bed after midnight (Jack was bizarrely hyper) and the back and forth coughing between Jack and me, we all slept fairly well.  Jack laid quietly on top of his Cars sleeping bag until I awoke this morning.  Can’t ask for better than that!  I got up and our gracious host had a latte waiting for me.  Ahhh, bliss.  Jack and I spent a good hour and a half building robots with legos.  Whenever we go on vacation I’m reminded how fabulous it is to sit and play with my son without the billions of chores that would be calling my name at home.  Not only do I get to focus more on Jack, but my lego building prowess is steadily improving.

It's a roboty day.

We don’t have a lot of plans for the weekend but sledding is among them.  I bought some ultra cute polar bear snow boots on mega sale at Land’s End and I can’t wait to see Jack all bundled up.  He was so excited about our trip last night that he couldn’t stop giggling, which of course had me cracking up.  We need more vacation in our lives, methinks.