Help Empower Young Girls with a Click!

June 29, 2011 By 1 Comment

The following is a post sponsored by Yahoo! Every time someone clicks here to make Yahoo! their homepage, they're showing their support for Girls For A Change.

I was selected for this opportunity by Clever Girls Collective, which endorses Blog With Integrity, as I do.


Last fall I went to New York (insert New York song - it's what dreams are made of, I hear) and attended my first blogging conference - the one and only BlogHer. I met some awesome female bloggers, including Aunt Becky of Mommy Wants Vodka fame, whom I nearly tackled coming out of a party that I couldn't get into (I was late and the place was packed, bah!).  She was quite gracious about it, thankfully!

A few months after I came home, I found out that Aunt Becky had launched Band Back Together, which is a new little blogging baby of hers that has simply EXPLODED since it went live last fall.  I immediately fell in love with the group blogging site and its mission, which is: "Through the power of real stories written by real people, we can work together to destigmatize mental illness, abuse, rape, baby loss and other traumas so that we may learn, grow, and heal."  I simply had to be part of this and thankfully, Becky was accepting volunteers.

The site is less than a year old and has over 1,000 members contributing.  There are over 100 resource pages to connect people with information about anything from divorce to teen pregnancy (and more are added almost daily).  Becky and the rest of the Brains Behind the Band put in countless (unpaid!) hours every day to continually improve the site and support the contributors who share so much of themselves in order to get help and help others.

I feel so incredibly lucky to be part of this site and work with so many women who want to do good things for the blogging world (plus Becky's husband The Daver, who is also a vital part of the whole operation!).  I am inspired by Becky's ability to bring this to life in such a short time AND make it so successful (the site has already won a Bloggie and was recognized as one of the Top 25 Mental Wellness Blogs).  And Becky doesn't stop with the good ideas - she has recently invited teens into the fold at Band Back Together and plans to tackle non-profit paperwork next.

Which brings me to another very special non-profit organization out there called Girls For a Change. In their own words,

Girls For A Change (GFC) is a national organization that empowers girls to create social change. We invite young women to design, lead, fund and implement social change projects that tackle issues girls face in their own neighborhoods. GFC empowers girls for personal and social transformation. The program inspires girls to have the voice, ability and problem solving capacity to speak up, be decision makers, create visionary change and realize their full potential.

I'm sure you can see the similarities here.  I love that this organization is working with girls of an impressionable age to inspire, empower, and make them aware of their own strengths and influence on society.  I believe this is a great way to turn little girls into adult advocates and drivers of social change (perhaps like an Aunt Becky).

If you'd like to give a helping hand to Girls For A Change, Yahoo! is making it easy for you - click this link and follow the instructions to make Yahoo! your homepage between now and July 1st.  For each person who does this, Yahoo! will donate $10 to GFC, up to a total of $10,000.  We have until this Friday to find 1,000 individuals to meet this goal!

Please pass on this message, tweet with the hashtag #cleversforachange, get the word out on Facebook or other social networks.  I'd love to wake up Friday and see that $10K goal met!

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Fundraising Event for Band Back Together

June 3, 2011 By 1 Comment

I have been volunteering some time to help Becky Harks, founder of Band Back Together, for a few months now.  Band Back Together (BB2G) is a group blog where anyone can write and contribute a story and receive support from a community of bloggers.  The site covers anything from mental health to parenting to self improvement in the “Bringing Back the Happy World Tour.”

Since it’s launch in August 2011 the site has quickly become a favorite on the web.  The site won a 2011 Bloggie Award for “Best Kept Secret” and is currently a front runner at Circle of Moms as a Top 25 Mental Wellness blog.

Becky announced this week that the site is aiming to go non-profit.  This requires a good deal of time, paperwork, and, yes, money.  Everything related to the site has come out of Becky’s pocket thus far; however, there are many folks who are volunteering time and have offered to donate to costs, as well.  In an effort to facilitate this process, I have decided to donate all of my Stampin’ Up! profits on June sales (my profits are 20% of product sales) to Band Back Together.

So, details:
Make a purchase through this website in June and I will donate my profits of every sale to Band Back Together.  No matter what you buy or how much you spend, I’ll send it to Becky to help with the non-profit effort.  Just leave me a comment or send me an email to let me know that you’d like the proceeds to go to BB2G (we’d like to thank you!).

I am so lucky to be able to be involved with Band Back Together and so very thankful for the site’s presence on the internet.  I hope you are, too!

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Filed Under: Getting my groove back, Issues Tagged With: , , , , ,

I am blogging for mental health

May 18, 2011 By 7 Comments

May is Mental Health Month and today in particular is Mental Health Blogging Day.  I am a longtime sufferer of mentalMental Health Blog Party Badge illness and an advocate for awareness and support through the community support website Band Back Together.

I think days like this are important to let others know that they are not alone in their struggles with mental health issues.  Whether you are a sufferer, a friend, a family member, or an acquaintance of someone with a mental health issue, you can educate yourself and others and help make the world a more compassionate and supportive place.

My name is Crystal and I deal with mental illness on a regular basis.

Sometimes I don’t act like ME because I suffer from chronic Depression (diagnosed at age 14), Anxiety, and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (DES-NOS, specifically).  I attend weekly therapy and take medication to help me manage these issues.  I have difficulties managing my response to stressful situations and memories due to the way that my brain processes information/stimuli – multiple traumas throughout my life have impacted the way I view and experience the world around me.

Despite dealing with these issues for so much of my life, I can still live a normal life – I am not ‘crazy.’  I have a wonderful relationship with my husband and son.  I have a great job at a place I’ve worked for the past 3.5 years.  I have friends and hobbies and many of the same worries that others out there have.

Most days I am a very high functioning individual.  Sometimes I need to step back from my responsibilities a little bit and focus on taking extra care of myself.  There are those days when I can’t get out of bed – on those days I need help from my support network of family and friends.  I have fantastic people in my life who have helped me even when they don’t know it.

*****

I have heard various awful things said about those who suffer from mental illness over the years, even from people I love.  The stigma of mental illness still leads people to state that they wouldn’t vote for a politician who was known to have a mental disorder, or that those with a mental illness should not have children.  It’s disheartening to hear these things and I’m hopeful that as we speak out, the stigma will lift more and more.

If you or someone you know suffers from a mental illness, please take the time to educate yourself about the symptoms and effects on their life.  If you would like to reach out to a community for support please visit Band Back Together.

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Filed Under: Getting my groove back, Issues, PPD Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

A Gift that Gives

November 23, 2010 By Leave a Comment

Hey readers.  I hope you all will join me in helping my friend and fellow blogger Alecia raise awareness and funds for a rare disorder that her 9 month old niece suffers from called Food Protein-Induced Entercolitis Syndrome (FPIES).  Those suffering from this disorder cannot tolerate many of the proteins found in everyday foods, which can result in uncontrollable vomiting and diarrhea after eating and can lead to dehydration and even fatal shock.  I know it kills me every time my son is sick – I can hardly imagine how awful it is when food is the thing that makes your child sick.  If you’d like to help, there are several things you can do:

Please pass this information on and keep Alecia’s family in your thoughts!

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Truthiness Day 20: Drugs and Booze

October 27, 2010 By Leave a Comment

Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol.

I’m completely torn on this subject….

On one hand, I’ve seen drugs wreak havoc on the lives of many, including my father.  From his hospital bed my dad told me to never do drugs and I listened – I never tried a single illegal substance for the first 28 years of my life.  That includes weed, people!  (When I finally did try weed, I didn’t like it anyway, only partly due to my asthma issues.)

On the other hand, I’ve known those who have dabbled in various drugs and never developed an addiction.  I’m not sure what the difference is between these people and others, although I know in my dad’s case there was a severe depression underlying his drug use.

Intellectually I think people should be able to use recreational drugs as they would like – if they are okay with the risks to their health and well being, then what do I care?  Their judgment may be impaired, though, and if it happens that they do something that endangers others or is illegal, appropriate punishment is understandable.

BUT…drugs can have such a damaging impact on a person’s ability to interact with others, hold down a job, parent, etc.  The parenting part really gets me, naturally.  Being under the influence can have a negative impact on parent-child attachment, which can also affect child development.  Most people on drugs ARE affecting others even if they aren’t trying to; I expect that is at least a part of why drugs are outlawed.

I also have personal trauma associated with drugs so…I recognize that I am highly biased.  I have trouble being around anyone who is on drugs because it triggers me like nobody’s business.  I generally try to keep that to myself because my PTSD isn’t THEIR problem.  Even if I intellectually I am fine with someone making that decision for themselves, emotionally I can’t handle it so…yeah, I don’t like drugs.

Alcohol I can handle.  Somehow that is different.  Maybe because a person can have like half a glass of wine and be okay?  There is some sort of distinction there for me that I can’t fully explain.  I still don’t think it’s a responsible thing to do to get drunk while caring for a child.  I think there should always be an adult around who can make sound decisions when a child is involved.  Doing shots while your kid is upstairs sleeping doesn’t seem right to me – it seems beyond risky.  I’m no expert, though.

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Filed Under: 30 Days of Truth, Issues Tagged With: , , , , , , , ,

Truthiness Day 19: Religion and Politics

October 25, 2010 By Leave a Comment

Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?

I guess I’ll go with politics.

I research candidates and issues that are on the ballot when I vote, and that is pretty much as involved in politics as I get these days.  I avoid the news and the irritating campaigns – they aren’t helpful and tend to be paranoia-inducing.  I watch the occasional debate but more for entertainment because all of the content pretty much just sounds like lip service to me.  I find politics to be disheartening for the most part and very frustrating, especially local (California) politics because HOLY CRAP these people here like to spend money they don’t have.  I’m so very sick of bond measures…

Voting is kind of a shot in the dark, in my opinion.  You make your best educated guess and hope that in a few decades there will be more forward-moving than backward.

I think I mostly vote so that I feel entitled to bitch about things with which I disagree…

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Truthiness Day 18: Maawwaige

October 24, 2010 By 1 Comment

Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage.

My views on “gay marriage” are the same as my views on “straight marriage.”  It’s marriage plain and simple, and if you prohibit a sector of society that is fully capable of making their own decisions from participating in a societal right, that is discrimination.  I’m not into discrimination; are you?

Marriage in this country is tied up in decisions affecting a spouse’s health and well-being and financial issues.  There is no reason why these issues should be different for same-sex couples than they are opposite-sex couples.  Health and finances have no bearing on the gender of a spouse.  The legal institution of marriage is NOT the same as the religious institution; I see no reason why the religious sector has any bearing on this issue at all.

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Filed Under: 30 Days of Truth, Issues Tagged With: , , , , , , , ,

Truthiness Day 14: Goodbye to you

October 20, 2010 By 3 Comments

Day 14 → A hero that has let you down. (letter)

Dear Dad,

Where do I begin?

When I was a child you were the person I looked up to the most.  You were smart, good looking and talented even beyond music, art, and sports.  My world revolved around you; when my mom told me to go to sleep so that I could wake up and see Mr. Sunshine, I thought she was talking about you.

With all that you had going for you, I don’t understand how you could do the things you did.  You seemed to carry so much life, yet you destroyed that light with drugs.  You then left the evidence behind for me to find and I had to ask my mother, “Why is daddy sniffing sugar?”  How could you pack your things and leave my mom while she was 6 months pregnant with your third child together?  Do you know that she had a panic attack when she came home to an empty house?  You then proceeded to max out the credit card buying things for your new girlfriend while my mom worked the night shift at the gas station to make ends meet…while your girlfriend was being swathed in the fur coat you bought for her, my mom was held up at gun point on more than one occasion.

You were neglectful and reckless.  You left me in charge of my younger siblings while you went out to party before I was even 9 years old.  You nearly drove us off the side of the levee into the river in your VW Bug regularly just so you could get a thrill.  I still can’t get anywhere near the side of a cliff without dealing with panic and vertigo.  I also can’t pick up the telephone without suffering severe anxiety thanks to your yelling at me for forgetting phone numbers when calling Information on your behalf.

Recently I learned that you hit me in the stomach because I left the table without asking for permission.  I was 3 or 4 years old.  I can’t even begin to wrap my head around that one.

I’ve heard a lot of excuses for the things you did, and so much blame has been shifted to others.  I think my grandparents still put you up on a pedestal, believing that you were their golden boy who could never do wrong.

I missed you for a long time after you died.  Now I can’t help but think of how much more damage you would have caused in the lives of others if you had lived past 30.  I barely remember the good things because there is just so much bad to eclipse them.  I wish I could still pretend that you were a good dad.  I wish I still had my hero.

Sincerely,

Crystal

Filed Under: 110 in 2010, 30 Days of Truth, Family, Issues Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Mental Health Month

April 30, 2010 By 2 Comments

May is Mental Health Month.  I attended a WEGO webinar earlier this week to learn how to participate in spreading awareness, so you will likely be seeing some informational posts and/or tweets from me throughout the month.  I’d also like to let you all know that if you have any questions about mental health, particularly in relation to the things I am intimately familiar (Depression, Anxiety, Dissociative Disorder, Post-Traumatic Stress, Post-Partum Depression), please feel free to ask.  I have been dealing with these issues for over 15 years and have no problem sharing the wealth of information and resources I’ve collected in the mean time.  It’s important to continue talking about mental health issues to battle stigmas.  [Note: I do have a post written up about a lot of these issues but it is password protected for my family's sake.  If you would like the information to access it, please send me an email.]

While I plan to be involved in the activities to spread awareness throughout May, I am (appropriately?) enmeshed in a depressive episode and my posting may be sporatic.  Depression often creates some brutal writer’s block for me, which is…depressing.  :P   I’m trying to pull back from commitments where I can to focus on getting back on track mentally.  In the mean time, I appreciate your patience and hope that you continue to engage when I *am* around.

If you are looking for mental health resources, the National Institute of Mental Health and WEGO Health Mental Health Community are two great places to start.  In addition, a dear friend of mine Sarahndipitea is a community health educator with WEGO and also writes a weekly column on Savings.com called Balanced that focuses on simple and inexpensive ways to maintain your overall health.

Now, if you wouldn’t mind sharing – how have mental health issues touched your life?  What is your perspective on helping others who suffer from mental health disorders?

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World AIDS Day

December 1, 2009 By 4 Comments

I first wrote about my dad on this blog here.  Here is another piece of our story.

My dad got sick when I was 9 or so (and he was 28). He was in and out of the hospital but we (his 4 kids) weren’t told why. He lost his job when they found out about his illness. He took a trip to Arizona to visit his best friend and see the place where we lived when I was a born, then he came back to Sacramento and was admitted to the hospital a short time later. He withered away there before being moved to a nursing home when there was nothing more they could do for him. Once he moved there, it was only a short time before he passed away.

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It’s unbelievable to me that that was 18 years ago.  Even more unbelievable is how much it still hurts me and how clear the memories are of him in that hospital bed.  I remember the hospital in more detail than I remember life before he got sick.  I remember the smell of the place he got transferred to once the hospital knew they could do nothing else for him.  I remember the morning he died and the years of swearing I saw sightings of him everywhere.  His death still haunts me.  I’m sure as an adult it is awful to see someone die from AIDS but as a kid it was terrifying, as well. My dad had such vitality, being an all-American type who was a star athlete, a musician, and an artist. In a matter of months, he went from being a strong, energetic man to being a skeletal human smaller than his young kids.

Like I said, we weren’t told that my dad had AIDS. My mom told us that he had Meningitis and Encephalitis (which I think are the things that actually did him in). I was finally told the truth about a year after he died but was sworn to secrecy (even from my siblings). I can’t tell you how many times I sat silently through nasty comments about people with HIV/AIDS. I can’t even articulate how misinformed people are. I think it’s a shame that I had to keep it such a secret, when it would have been better to share my story and get people more familiar with who is affected by it. Back then it was still considered a gay disease and I am sure that all of the misinformation contributed to the state of things now with so many heterosexuals thinking they weren’t at risk. It’s very unfortunate that this disease is still wreaking havoc and so widespread. It’s sad that even now those suffering with it are discriminated against. It’s disappointing that after more than two decades of the disease there is no cure or vaccine. I hope to see one of those in my lifetime.

Support World AIDS Day

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