Letting Go

Today is Jack’s last day in daycare.  He’s been with G for over two years (a miracle when you think back to all the daycare dramas early on in his life) and made some awesome little friends there.  G’s house is basically Jack’s third house – there were many weeks there where he spent just as much time there as he did at my house or his dad’s.  G feeds him and teaches him and celebrates his victories and birthdays.  Jack was potty trained there before he was at home!

In the last 2+ years, G has taken only ONE unscheduled day off – for Jury Duty.  One day, you guys!  She is simply amazing.

I’m having a hard time walking away from this lady.  She is one of the most reliable, dependable, trustworthy, and caring people I have ever known – it has been a BLESSING to be able to put Jack in her care.

I don’t think it’s hit Jack yet.  He knows today is his last day and that he’ll have a goodbye party, but all he could say was that he was hoping for presents.  :P   We tried to tell him this isn’t the kind of thing you get presents for.  In any case, he starts school Monday and I’m guessing somewhere in that week he’ll really start to miss G.  I know I will!

I had a difficult time coming up with a gift that conveyed how much we love G.  What we ended up with was this poem made into an artful poster by Etsy artist MySoulShines and matted/framed:

They Will Remember

by Eileen Koscho

I take care of your children.
I love them.
I teach them.
I clean them, and I feed them.
And when nighttime comes,
my heart worries about them
I take care of your children.
I see their first steps.
I hear their first words.
I share their happiness, and
I feel their hurts.
I take care of your children,
as if they were my own.
And when they are grown, and
no longer need me,
My love will be a part of them
deep within the heart of them.
They will know that I was there for them unconditionally.
And they will remember!


This morning it occurred to me that I should have had a coffee mug or something made with Jack’s artwork to give to her.  Dang it!  Maybe I’ll ship that to her…

Here is a picture of G with Jack on his birthday (she is so cool – she got him the alien space ship Legos):

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Random notes on Jack

  • He wants to be a bat for Halloween.  NOT Batman (which is unfortunate because he has quite a few costume options there).
  • He is determined to grow his hair long “like a Viking warrior.”  I have a feeling this idea came from his dad.  I haven’t been able to convince him to cut his hair yet and, to be honest, it is pretty cute.  Still, I’ve taken to calling him Beiber Boy, especially when he swings his head to get the hair out of his eyes.
  • Jack is suddenly very modest.  I’m not allowed to see his “parts” and usually have to leave the room while he is getting dressed (even if he is getting dressed in the living room).  This made for a conundrum during bath time last night because he wanted company while bathing.  I was instructed to look at the ceiling at all times, even while launching him into the bath like a rocket.
  • Naps appear to be a thing of the past.  Jack doesn’t seem to need them anymore and bedtime goes more smoothly without them anyway.
  • Jack will do almost anything for chocolate.
  • Scooby-Doo is now a big deal.  I wish he would have consulted me first.
  • We can usually interrupt Jack’s television or movie watching if we promise to record it.  He has that Tivo down these days and even paused a show all by himself to use the bathroom.
  • By the way, he is super fully potty trained.  He can still hold it for hours, though.  It’s pretty awesome that he uses the toilet, wipes his butt, and washes his hands all without help.
  • He is a child of a million questions, usually something that goes like, “What does doll mean?”  I feel like a walking dictionary.
  • Half the time he says something so grown up sounding that we feel like we couldn’t have heard him right.  I couldn’t figure out what the hell he was saying about “My gray shun” and that was because he was talking about migration.  It’s not totally my fault, though – when he’s not using big words, he is making up words like “swack” and “cackrages.”
  • Thankfully, Jack will still snuggle with me.  Other than that, I can hardly see a trace of baby Jack in him.  He is growing up!  *sniff*
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This Morning

Jack climbed into bed with me to snuggle under the blankets.  He laid his head on my chest and said, “Mom, I love you.”

While in the shower, Jack came into the bathroom and said Wall-E and Eve wanted to show me something.  I peeked out of the shower curtain to see Wall-E’s arms around Eve.  “Look, they are hugging because they love each other!”

Jack watched me while I applied my make up…

Mom, what are you doing?

I’m putting on make up.

Why?  So that you have eyebrows?


Little mister

Sometimes I look at Jack and can see our future, see him as a teenager.  He is so serious when he says, “Well, mom, when you said that it hurt my feelings,” or “Mom, I didn’t like that.  I’m going away from you.”  He is trying to be grown up and yet so obviously unprepared to deal with what that means.  I know how he feels.

Jack has a close friend at daycare again.  He and Sydney are often chasing each other around when I arrive to pick Jack up.  On the drive home yesterday, Jack told me, “Sydney is my best friend, mom.  She’s a nice girl.”  I’m thankful her parents have kept her in the daycare rather than moving her to preschool.  I worry about the day the two kids will be split up, though.  I wish I could give Jack the kind of childhood where he grows up with the kids down the street.  I’m not sure that kind of life exists in the city.

When we get home for the day, Jack usually runs to the front door and announces “I beat you!”  This time, he forgot to run and I got there first.  He dissolved into tears because he wanted to win.  I tried to explain that sometimes other people have to win: “you can’t win all the time but you should always try your best.”  He didn’t like that, of course.  I took him back outside to redo the “race” and halfway to the door he turned around and hit me to make sure I wouldn’t beat him to the door.  That brought on another explanation about how we don’t sabotage others just because we want to win very badly…yes, these are the conversations I have with my not-quite-4 year old child.  I’m sure I will repeat them over and over as he grows.

Lately Jack has become attached to a stuffed monster he calls Starbucks.  (How’s that for a sign of the times?)  He brings that monster to daycare every day.  Today he forgot and I was running late so I neglected to remind him prior to leaving the house.  We pulled up to G’s house and I unbuckled the carseat.  Jack started looking for Starbucks right away and my heart sank.  I saw his face when he couldn’t find his monster and when he asked me where it was, I told him the bad news.  Cue tears.  I felt like crying, too.  “I’m sorry we forgot Starbucks, honey.  I will bring him to you when I pick you up today.  I know you will miss him today.”  I considered going back home to get his toy before driving to work…  “He’ll recover,” G said.  I know she was right but still…I wish I had gone back home.

Becoming Self-Sufficient

Today started off quite differently than yesterday.

Yesterday Jack threw a fit when he was told he should use the potty first thing when he gets up in the morning.

Today?  He happily marched into the bathroom, used the potty, and washed his hands without help.

Yesterday I had to wrangle him into his clothes for the day.

Today he picked out his own outfit in its entirety and dressed himself (shoes included).  This is a FIRST!

Yesterday wasn’t all bad.  We tried out a yellow bell pepper since he loves the red ones so much and he devoured the entire thing.  When prompted to use the potty and get ready for bed, he peed, washed his hands, and brushed his teeth all by himself.  I was rather blown away.

Gosh, my little boy is growing up.