Response to the daycare lady

On top of everything else that was going on yesterday, I really didn’t need my daycare provider suggesting that my two month old son needed to start learning to fall asleep in his crib by himself. She is a friend of mine and I trust her for the most part, but this has really given me doubts. Anyway, here’s my response:

Okay, read the babycenter article and also did more research. Here’s my take on this – I think 2 months old is too young for sleep training. I do realize that he can’t be held all the time (I don’t hold him constantly, either), but I do prefer that he get the comfort he needs to fall asleep. At home, this is usually through nursing or rocking, and once he enters deep sleep (he stops twitching and his arms are totally limp), we put him down. So, if he falls asleep when you feed him, you could try rocking him for a bit until he hits that deep sleep period and then put him in his carrier or the crib. If you put him in the crib, it might help to roll up some blankets and place them on either side of him so that he feels like he’s not alone in there (I use a pillow at home in our bed and wedge it next to him only as high as his arm pit). If he’s in his carrier and starts to wake up, it can be rocked a bit to lull him back to sleep (we do this at restaurants all the time). He is pretty distracted, also, so a quiet room might help (this may be why he seems to nap less at daycare than at home – he doesn’t want to miss out on the excitement of the other kids). White noise is good, too. We use a fan in our bedroom at home.
Also, I have a backpack carrier thing that you could use if you think that would be helpful. He falls asleep in those things pretty well, and you would have your hands free. When he falls into a deep sleep, you can lay him down. Let me know if you want that.

Swaddling him might also get him to fall asleep more easily, and keep him asleep longer. It calms him down when he gets worked up, and then I usually nurse him to sleep. He’s only ever needed swaddling a few times at home, but if you would like to try a swaddle, feed, and nap routine and find that it works during the week, I can do it at home on the weekends, too.

I hope these are helpful suggestions. Let me know how he does today ’cause he seemed super excitable the last two days and I think it’ll pass.


Good Answer:
I agree with you that he needs the closeness. I was just trying to get a feel for his “routine” (as much as a baby can have one) at home so we are both offering the same thing and he will feel as little variation as possible. He will start developing routines so consistency is important where possible. My concern was that he seemed to be wanting to be held more and more as the days went by so I wanted to make sure that he wasn’t getting into the habit but that it was just a temporary “phase” kind of thing. Which by what you just shared … it is. I held all of my children as much as I could so I understand how you and Joe feel about the closeness and the comforting. I felt that my kids didn’t need a security blanket or toy because I was their security. They always knew, even from birth, that if they needed anything it would be provided. I want Jack to feel that same thing when he is here. I tried swaddling and putting the crib in my room. I do put supports at his sides so he feels something up against him when he wiggles. I smiled when I read that you use a fan. We do that too. I keep the fan or the air cleaner on when kids are napping so any unexpected noises aren’t as noticeable. Seems to work great. I hope I didn’t offend you. I like to touch bases often about infants in my care and their life at home because they change so often in the beginning of life. I believe the best thing for the baby is for the day care provider to have a clear understanding of life with mom and dad.

Hope we are okay. See you later alligator.

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