I don’t have a lot to say these days. I’ve been trying to get naps and hobbies in when I’m not working or taking care of Jack. I am pretty depressed, have been for months, and the snippets of free time I get are not enough to relieve it. I am so unhappy with every part of my life right now. I have everything I have wanted for so long and I resent it.
I don’t want to get on medication while breastfeeding but I think the effect of my depression on Jack is worse than the small amount of antidepressant he would get through my milk. There are quite a few antidepressants that are considered safe for breastfeeding mothers, but do I trust the medical community in this regard? I don’t think I have much choice, considering my history.
So, uh, lots to contemplate and little to say about it.