Children as Masters of Torture

Jack went to bed at 8 last night and I did a little dance, pumping my fist in in triumph.  I thought maybe he was getting back on track.  Over the last few days he has been sleeping better at night, even sleeping through.  I had started to breathe a sigh of relief that perhaps the sleep regression was behind us…

Kids are master torturers, aren’t they?  Absolutely brilliant.  Just went I decided to slide into bed, Jack awoke.  I got him settled and then I had just drifted off when he woke again.  The number of times he repeated this has been lost in a foggy haze but let me just say that it was excrutiatingly frequent.  I ended up with maybe 2 hours of patched together sleep.

My brother-in-law and I commiserated this morning, as his daughter has been doing the same thing.  We wondered why no one tells you about these hard times before you have kids, and could only conclude that misery loves company.  I suspect there is an equal component of fried parent-brain that turns any potential warnings into nonsensical gibberish.  Either that or in becoming a parent we learn to speak a different language, one that only other parents can understand.

I think that if you can’t understand what a parent is saying, you can safely assume it is some version of, “I am so tired my face is going to explode.”

2 thoughts on “Children as Masters of Torture”

  1. I learned back in November that I can take 10 nights of this before it makes me cry. I figure that’s valuable if I’m taken prisoner and tortured.

  2. I’ve heard plenty about the hard times from most of the parents I know (Jack is like an angel sleeper compared to Hudson ;-)). I think some parents just don’t talk about it because they want the world to think that everything is fine. I would also guess, they don’t want advice and they don’t want to be judged.

    From what I’ve seen on the non-parent side of things people either filter out the bad stuff, or they assume that they can do it better. Oh MY baby will never cry like that because I will do this (insert parenting philosophy here). Whenever one of my nephews has a breakdown I look at Rob and jokingly say that MY children will never act out like that. 😉

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